September 5, 2025 - Identity and Self-Worth Struggles When Your Inner Voice Says "I'm Just Not That Kind of Person.”
“Talk to Yourself Like You Talk to Someone You Love.” - Brene Brown
Listen to audio, or read this meditation:
This muse cuts deep, and I want to go easy with you as we talk about it. Sometimes the biggest obstacle to building discipline isn't external - it's the voice in your head that whispers, "Who are you kidding? You're just not the disciplined type."
Maybe you've tried to change before and it didn't stick, so now you've labeled yourself as "the one who never follows through." Maybe your family always called you "the messy one" or "the procrastinator," and those labels feel like permanent tattoos on your identity.
Here's what breaks my heart: you start to believe that lacking discipline is just who you are, like having brown eyes or being tall. You think it's fixed, unchangeable, written in stone.
But beautiful one, that's not true. That's just a story you've been telling yourself, and stories can be rewritten.
The truth is, identity is fluid. You are not your past behaviors. You are not your mistakes. You are not your family's labels or society's expectations. You are a human being with infinite capacity for growth and change.
Every day of your life you get to decide who you want to be. Every morning is a chance to act like the person you're becoming, not the person you used to be.
I used to think I was "bad with money" because I'd made poor financial choices. That identity kept me stuck because why would someone who's "bad with money" bother creating a budget? It wasn't until I started acting like someone who was "learning to be good with money" that things began to change.
The secret is this: you don't have to feel like a disciplined person to act like one. In fact, it's the opposite - you act like the person you want to become, and eventually, your identity catches up.
Start small and be patient with yourself. Every time you do something aligned with who you want to be, you're casting a vote for that new identity. Skip the gym once? That's one vote for "lazy." Show up anyway? That's one vote for "dedicated." The person with the most votes wins.
You are allowed to outgrow old versions of yourself. You are allowed to surprise people who thought they had you figured out. You are allowed to become someone completely different from who you used to be.
So Here’s Your Action Step: Complete this sentence: "I am becoming someone who..." (for example, "I am becoming someone who takes care of their health" or "I am becoming someone who follows through on commitments"). Write it down and put it somewhere you'll see it every day. Then, ask yourself: "What would someone like that do today?" and do that one thing. You're not pretending to be someone else - you're practicing being the person you're becoming! You can do this!
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